Next in the list of wonderful people to take my blog for a spin is the, quite frankly, uber-talented Angela Addams. It’s all yours, Angie.
I started getting tattooed when I was 19. In fact, my very first tattoo was so painful (the artist admitted to me later that he was intentionally more heavy handed than he needed to be…asshole) that I vowed never to get another one again. As you can see from my pic, that was a vow I broke….big time. I think that my current count is somewhere around 14 or so…but I don’t sit around and count my tattoos very often so I can’t say for sure. We’re not talking little butterflies either…the artist that I went to for years always had a saying whenever I came in with a new idea, “BIGGER” he’d say… “BIGGER, ANGIE!!!” and so we always went bigger.
For a long time I would always make sure to get ink that I could cover, primarily because I was very concerned about judgment within my profession. So yes, that meant if I was going anywhere where I could possibly run into someone from work I would wear jeans and ¾ length shirts, even in the summer. My family didn’t know about my tattoos either…so yeah, I’d cover up for family events too.
I lived and breathed the tattoo world for quite some time. My bff worked as a piercer at a tattoo shop for many years and I would go there to not only get work done but to hang out as well. I went to tattoo conventions. I drank and partied with some of the biggest, most kickass, heavily tattooed folks you could meet. So I didn’t realize until I moved away from the people who were “like me” how very different the rest of the world tends to view women who have many tattoos. I have faced some element of judgment living in a community where my tattooed self kinda stands out. I’ve been followed around stores by security…I’ve been ignored while waiting for service (trust me, that doesn’t last long, I tend to speak up 😉 I’ve been asked inappropriate questions and scolded about how terrible my tattoos will look in thirty years and what a shame I must be to my mother. It’s kind of unbelievable what people think is okay to say to another individual that they don’t know.
What people don’t realize is that my tattoos do many things for me, many positive things. They act as conversation starters…you show me, I’ll show you kinda stuff. They act as a shield…some folks find my appearance intimidating and at times, that’s exactly what I want. A turn on…yes, some men find tattoos on women very attractive and that can be flattering. They are moments in time, symbols of what makes me me. Most importantly though, my tattoos have always been a way of working through the burden of depression. I’ve found that when I’m feeling my lowest, getting tattooed has been a way for me to work through the pain on the inside by feeling a little pain on the outside. Some folks might think that’s a little strange but it seems to work for me. So, there’s more to it than a little (or a lot) of ink on my skin.
We are a judgmental society. I’d be a fool to think that people don’t judge me based on my appearance. I realize that when I walk down the street showing my tattoos, no one is thinking, wow that is one intelligent, highly educated, hard working woman there. Do I care? No, not really. Getting tattooed is an expression of who I am. It’s a part of my life that I won’t ever walk away from. My ink gives me power, and as a woman I value that above most things.
Amazon Author Central: http://www.amazon.com/Angela-Addams/e/B005JOTBPM
Every day is Halloween for author Angela Addams. Enthralled by the paranormal at an early age, Angela spends most of her time thinking up new story ideas that involve supernatural creatures in everyday situations.
Well, until now, that is. Angela has recently expanded her creative repertoire to include contemporary erotica, because the written word is an amazing tool for crafting the most erotic of scenarios even if there are no werewolves in sight.
She lives in Ontario, Canada with her loving husband and children.
A few months ago I wrote a post about sex scenes for my good friend, the fantastic author Angela Addams.
As I’ve been very busy getting tattooed today, I haven’t had time to write a whole new blog, so I thought I’d re-post my thoughts on writing sex scenes.
Although a massive generalisation, it’s very quickly become apparent to me that women write better sex scenes then men. I can think of, at a push, three male writers who write excellent sex scenes in their books. I can think of at least a dozen women, right off the top of my head who do the same.
Now, of course there are women who can’t write sex scenes either, but even so, the odds are firmly in the female court.
So, it was with a little trepidation that it became apparent that my first book, Crimes Against Magic, was going to have sex in it. This was a problem for one reason. My sex scenes were dreadful. They read a little bit like an educational sex talk given by a teacher for whom the word ‘sex’ should never leave their mouth. They were dry, dull and quite frankly about as sexy as wet cardboard.
So, I tried spicing them up a bit and found a new problem. They now sounded like a porn film. All I needed to do was add a handlebar moustache and have the main character come to check on the woman’s boiler, fridge, cooker, pluming and I’d have had a career in writing truly terrible sex scenes. It’s something to think about if this whole ‘published author’ thing doesn’t work out.
So I needed to re-work it again. And this time I found some good advice. Apparently, I’m pretty good at writing action scenes. So, why not try writing a sex scene in the same way? Everyone writes action scenes in their own way, but I tend to map out where everyone is and what they’re doing, or going to be doing.
Applying it to a sex scene was actually straight forward. Instead of several people all in the same place I only had to deal with two (although, your mileage may vary). So, I wrote it as if it were an action scene, or a fight. Once I had the backbone for it, I found it much easier to go through it and make it ‘sexier’, but having that base was necessary for me.
Since that first time, I’ve found it much easier to switch into ‘sex scene mode’ for writing and can usually manage it without the need for the clinical part first. I’m never going to write the greatest sex scenes of all time, but I hope I’m no longer in the same bracket as some of the truly terrible ones.
When I was 21 years old I was dating a complete nutcase. We’ve all had one relationship with someone who, as it turned out, was an utter dick, and that was mine. And if you haven’t had one of those… well that could be because you’re that person for everyone else.
To celebrate the fact that I not only broke up with her crazy ass, but I also left my soul-sucking job, I decided to get my first tattoo.
I wanted to get something special and something that was meaningful to me, so i picked something I loved (comics) and a character from it I enjoyed reading about (Daredevil). It wasn’t a terribly painful experience, although it wasn’t without it’s moments, but it was nice enough that I didn’t once think about stopping there.
You see there’s something no one really told me before I got the Daredevil tattoo. They’re really addictive. Now for the most part I’ve restrained myself from having too many done and only get one when I find something worthwhile having done. So over the years I got a tattoo of my daughter, Keira’s name wrapped around my arm in Japanese. A Samurai when Keira was born.
And two anime wolves next to one another when my second daughter was born.
So, when my wife and I discovered she was pregnant, I knew I was going to get another tattoo. It was just a question of what. After getting the wolves, I knew it had to be something just about the new baby. But it wasn’t until we settled on the name Harley that I knew with a hundred percent certainty what I wanted.
So, next thursday I’m off to get a new tattoo on my forearm and I can’t wait.
Now there are a few things that people should know before they get a tattoo.
1. Yes, of course it bloody well hurts. How much depends on where you get it done and what you get done, along with who is doing the work.
2. If you get something done, try and make it personal to you. Just because everyone else has tribal tattoos on their arms, doesn’t mean you have to.
3. Don’t go with a tattooist just because it’s cheap. Cheap and tattoos are not good friends. Research the tattooist and find out how his/her work looks.
4. Eat before you go. Seriously this is incredibly important unless you like the idea of passing out. At least drink something sugary.
5. Research. Not only the pic you want, but also where you want it and how big. If you go to a tattoo parlour with a copy of a picture you’ve already found, it’ll make everything much easier.
So if you’re thinking of getting a tattoo done, just try to be original and above all enjoy the experience, it really isn’t all that scary.
And now for a Born of Hatred update:
It’s still almost done. Seriously, I’ve got about 2 chapters to write.
As for Crimes Against Magic. Well, this week has been insane. In a good way. I sold 104 copies on Monday and averaged about 70ish books for the other days (so far only 57 today, but you can’t knock 57). I also now have 23, 5 star reviews, which is incredible.
At the moment this is where it sits.
Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #1,562 Paid in Kindle Store (See Top 100 Paid in Kindle Store)
- #8 in Books > Science Fiction & Fantasy > Fantasy > Magic & Wizards
- #30 in Books > Science Fiction & Fantasy > Fantasy > Contemporary
- #31 in Kindle Store > Kindle eBooks > Fiction > Fantasy > Contemporary
Once again it’s been a superb week and I wouldn’t change it for anything. I’ll do a post about full sales when I’m back after my Aug break once Harley is born. So, until next week, have a great weekend.